A healthy network, in contrast to a gossip-fueled grapevine, is one that operates on the principle that what’s good for one is good for all. Because of this positive orientation, healthy networks encourage mutuality and reciprocity: we talk up fellow members, who talk us up in turn. We recommend, advocate and take actions that help one another to advance. We share resources, connections, ideas, and solutions.
This provides all network members with multiple points of leverage, enabling us to broaden our connections and build our skills, even as we help others to do the same.
What’s more, by embedding us in a web of alliances and diverse relationships that build upon one another, healthy networks augment our power in the world and help us rise together.
Bill Carrier, the leadership coach and master network facilitator I quoted last week, notes that in every network, people assume one of three roles: contributor, neutral, or threat.
• Contributors are always on the lookout for opportunities for others, actively making recommendations, providing contacts, and sharing resources.
• Neutrals are part of the network either because people either like them or want to associate with their status. Neutrals may prove helpful to others, but they aren’t proactive about it and may be unavailable when others approach them.
• Threats view the network instrumentally, as a tool for self-gain, seeing contribution through the lens of quid pro quo. Because threats feel little loyalty to the group, they may also feel free to gossip and trade inside information, weakening solidarity and trust in the network as a whole.
Having worked with networks for decades, Bill has found that healthy ones protect themselves by discouraging the kind of griping and negativity that grapevines tend to thrive on. He says, “No network is entirely free of back-channel conversations, but they cannot be allowed to diminish the group as a whole. Backbiting and telling tales are corrosive behaviors, so strong networks will not tolerate those who demonstrate them for too long. Over time, habitual self-seekers will get frozen out.”
Bill also notes that, to maintain itself, a healthy network finds ways to deal with negative practices such as venting and complaining, which serve only to drag us down rather than lifting us up.
I’d love to hear from readers about how healthy networks you’ve been a part of have dealt effectively with negative behaviors. Please contribute your comments below.